How To Protect Your Kids From The Recession

Whether you’ve been hit hard by the recession or not, kids and families may be reeling from the effects of the troubled times without a frame of reference for how tough it is out there.

Arun Abey, former investment strategist and author of the book How Much is Enough, from Greenleaf Book Group Press (www.howmuchisenough.net), believes that parents don’t just need to teach their kids about finances, but also about the relationship between money and quality of life.

“It’s not easy to say that money isn’t everything in a recession, but it isn’t,” Abey said. “It’s so easy to fall into the trap of making sure your kids understand the importance of making a good living financially, but if we leave out the part about lasting fulfillment in their careers, we’re shortchanging them. It leads to the avaricious corporate behavior that has been rampant in recent years where people pursue ever more money with no sense of meaning or perspective.”

Still, Abey also believes we need to get our kids smart about finances early to help protect them now and in the future. To that end, he offers some basic tips for families who want to get themselves – and their kids – smart now about financial matters.

• Don’t Let Money Be Invisible – Working-class families during the Great Depression routinely set jars out in full view of the family marked ‘Rent,” “Food,” “Clothes,” and so on, showing everyone where the money went. Today, money comes out of ATMs, and is spent via debit cards and credit cards – invisible to kids as to where it comes from and where it goes. Kids lack a frame of reference.

• Give Kids Responsibility for Spending – One of the ways to get kids smart fast is to present a situation in which real consequences exist, by placing them in charge of their discretionary spending. If they receive an allowance, then parents should require their kids to map out the money they have coming and also where it goes. Seeing it on paper or in a computer chart will give them a sense of reality about their money, and also build healthy financial habits they will cling to in later life.

• Teach the Power of Investment – A typical method parents use to get kids interested in saving money is to help them set up a savings account. The part that is often left out regard the value of that investment. Parents should spell it out. For example, a simple investment of $100 in a basic savings account can result in a balance of $12,000 after 20 years. If they invest that same $100 in a bond or a stock that returns merely 6 percent a year, that balance grows to $42,000-plus.

• For Love or Money? – Most affluent families try to direct their children toward high-earning careers, such as medicine, high finance or business management. Working class families stress education, and also try to drive their kids toward high-status career paths in an effort to help them get out of the pattern of hopelessness and disillusionment that characterizes many of their childhoods. However, there is an alternative method, which directs children toward career paths that stress their passions, what they love to do. This path stresses lasting fulfillment over financial rewards, even though, in many cases, people wind up with both by following this path. Ask your kids what they are passionate about and what they are good at. The answers to those questions will lead to a happier life and a better quality of life than one centered on the pursuit of the almighty dollar.

“I can’t think of a more important moment in America’s history to teach these lessons,” Abey said. “The current financial crisis, caused equally by reckless bankers as well as uninformed consumers, underscores the need for this kind of education and understanding. It’s critical not just for mom and dad, but for the whole family, if future generations have a hope of being spared the pitfalls that led to today’s crisis.”

Four Rules for Sharing Bad News with Your Children in an Economic Crisis

ou can’t turn on the television anymore without hearing words that make you want to reach for the mute button: economy, recession, layoffs, crisis. You hear them all day at work, too, in the form of rumors and speculation from worried coworkers. And here’s the thing: If you’re constantly immersed in economic anxiety, it’s likely your kids are too. Chances are you’ve already fielded some tough questions: What does “recession” mean? Why did my best friend’s dad lose his job? And maybe even Mom, are we going to have to move out of our house like our neighbors did?

So what is the best way to keep your kids informed without oversharing and creating needless anxiety? Here are four tips from the workplace to keep in mind:

Never say never. When a university management team shared with their employees they would be able to avoid layoffs by cutting jobs through attrition, they lost credibility when the budget worsened and layoffs became inevitable. The lesson? Absolutes backfire. It’s important, with employees as well as with your children, not to make promises that aren’t within your power to keep.

“Never say never to children,” advises Woolf. “For example, you don’t want to say, ‘Mommy will never lose her job’ or ‘We’ll always have our house.’ You may feel certain today, but circumstances can always change, and making these rigid statements will put your credibility on the line. Instead, reassure them with the truth. Tell them that no matter what happens, your family will stick it out together. That’s one promise you know you will always be able to keep.”

Keep quiet until you have specific plans. An executive director of a non-profit organization told her staff that if their big funders discontinued their grants, layoffs were inevitable. Unfortunately, she released this information before she had a plan for handling her employees’ inevitably negative reactions. Questions, which she couldn’t answer, started pouring in: Who would be laid off first? When would there be definite news about the funders continuing their grants? In the end, not having solid information for them further damaged their morale and the director’s reputation. With kids, too, caution should be the rule of the day. If you are thinking about selling your house or relocating for a new job, wait to share the news with your kids until you know as many details as possible.

“Our kids consider what we tell them to be the absolute truth,” warns Woolf. “If you tell them the family might be moving, they will take that to mean that you are moving, and it may cause them unnecessary stress and worry. Children, especially those who are of school age, thrive on consistency. The thought of changing their lives, their home, and their friends, can be traumatic for them. Plus, if the move doesn’t happen, it can be hard for them to process what they are supposed to believe.

“Of course, you have to balance truth and secrecy,” she adds. “If your child asks you point-blank, ‘Mommy, are you going to lose your job?’ tell her, ‘I don’t know yet,’ and then add reasonable reassurance. And don’t wait until the last minute to spring bad news on your kids. Do that and they’ll think you’ve been keeping a secret from them. Be as honest and open with them as often as you can.”

Share a unified message. In the business world, when a management team leaks conflicting information, rumors fly and fear and distrust rise. In one instance, the director of nursing at a hospital leaked that there would be no staff cuts. At the same time, the administrative director shared a less reassuring message—that cuts were unlikely but possible. The mixed messages left staff feeling confused and skeptical. At home, make sure you and your partner are in agreement about what to share and what to keep quiet.

“During any kind of crisis that involves your family, the number one priority should be maintaining the lines of communication between you and your partner,” asserts Woolf. “Make sure that the two of you are on the same page as far as what you will and will not share with the children. And if you have a big announcement, tell your children together to ensure a unified message is conveyed. Seeing the two of you as a unified front will reassure them that you are working together as a family through whatever may come your way.”

Give them something to do to help. One of the worst parts of any crisis is feeling helpless to do anything about it. At the office, employees may be wringing their hands instead of helping to improve your company’s bottom line, simply because they don’t know what they can do. The same is true at home. Children are especially prone to feeling helpless, particularly in an economic crisis that they may not fully understand. Getting them involved will empower them and make them feel better about the situation at hand.

“Explain to your kids that saving money is very important right now,” suggests Woolf. “Then ask them to help you brainstorm ways the family can save money. And give them a money-saving task that is their responsibility, like turning off lights in unoccupied rooms or gathering old toys and making posters for a family yard sale. Get them involved with lowering your grocery bill by clipping coupons together on Sunday afternoons, or having them help hunt for bargains at the store. Not only will they feel good about being involved, but it creates a new way for you to carve out some quality time together.”

“In tough times, it can be easy to focus on all of your problems and end up forgetting how it may be affecting your kids,” says Woolf. “Handling these issues the wrong way can have long-lasting effects on your relationship with them. It may be hard to do, but worrying a little less about your bank account and a little more about your family will do you and your kids some good.
“Remember, while this tough economy is difficult, it also provides us with an opportunity to reevaluate the things in life that truly matter—our families and our children,” she concludes. “Focusing on them instead of the problems plaguing you at work and at home may be the stress reliever you’ve needed all along.”

About the Author:
Jamie Woolf is a regular contributor to Working Mother magazine and founder of The Parent Leader and Pinehurst Consulting, an organization development consulting firm. In her book, Mom-in-Chief: How Wisdom from the Workplace Can Save Your Family from Chaos, Woolf addresses real-life quandaries and covers everything that career-oriented women need to know to unleash their parenting potential and navigate challenges with skill and grace.

Community Fun Day

The Darlington Boys and Girls Club held a culminating event celebrating National Boys & Girls Club Week on April 3 and the whole community was invited to attend.
Florence-Darlington Tech baseball players were there tossing balls with the kids, and players from the Florence Phantoms arena football team were on hand to sign autographs and pose for pictures.
There was also face painting, a smokehouse and a toy jumper.